bitterness. don't judge me.

so, God. it's really interesting to me sometimes how you choose to do things. sometimes i think you make things more complicated than are really necessary. sometimes i think it would be okay to give people a break. like maybe you could consider letting certain people have it easy for a while...people who have done nothing but serve you with their entire lives. it just seems like you could ease up a bit. not that you have been cruel. i don't mean to imply that. i just don't think the words "lavish" and "abundant" and "favor" mean the same thing in your language as they do in ours here on the planet earth. i get that the whole "earning" thing is moot for you, but honestly, it seems like you could afford to work out some "blessings" for some people who live like you want them to. i don't get your dangling carrot method. i don't really see the good of it. give them the carrot or take the damn thing away, already. you seem a lot like a CEO today. a bald fat man with a mercedes who runs sweat shops full of poor, starving children in malaysia.

told you i was fickle.