snakes.

i have a new place, have i mentioned this? i'm living with my closest/longest friend Ashlee. it is great to live with someone i know so very well and trust so implicitly. as the last few days would imply, this is going to be a good situation. we just know each other's rhythms...there's no out-for-yourself mentality...we love each other and want to be around each other and that is so good. it's not a "pretty" place, although i have plans to make it so, but it does have a feeling of home that i am grateful for.

i am now a proud step-parent to five bearded dragons, a leopard gecko, and a ball python named monty. they're interesting little creatures...a lot more entertaining than you might expect. but there is a severe downside...one that breaks my heart:

my mother has a diagnosable phobia of snakes. her fear is extreme and irrational. when we were younger, there was a period of time that my mother would not allow me to go over to ashlee's house and she certainly didn't want me sleeping there because of her snakes. a few of them have died through the years, leading my mother to believe that perhaps ashlee no longer had any snakes. it was my intention to allow this belief...to hide the snake upstairs anytime my mother would come over. but alas, i cannot hide things from my mother. so i confessed to her last night. her reaction was worse than i could have expected. the panic and fear it immediately caused her almost made me cry. then i got mad, like all good children do. "so, what, are you never going to come visit me then? are you never going to come to my house because of a stupid snake?" it was very mean of me. since my degree is in psychology, i should, of all people understand the helpless and irrational panic of a phobia. and of all people, i should have patience with my mother. but this is a deeply sad state of affairs. my favorite person in the world can't come to my house, and i've made her feel guilty for it. geez.