colors.

i cannot believe how green the trees are. how blue the sky is. and when you look at them together, how breathtaking the contrast is. there is such a vibrance in people that walk by. the clothes they choose to wear...how they wake up in the morning and think, "i feel good in this today." and how different that looks from one person to the next. so many colors that walk by. have you ever noticed buildings? how structurally different they can be from one another? and how a color scheme can completely change the look of a home? i'm noticing how beautiful this place is. "this place" being wherever i am at the moment. people speak so differently. so many tones of voices. so many different laughs. and facial expressions...like a million different languages to learn, not just speak. and there are so many smells i've never noticed before. not just the perfumes that waft by, but the way the air smells...it changes from place to place, restaurant to restaurant, mountains, beaches, streets, churches, hotels...they each have such different smells. there is so much vibrance. so much to take in. and every little thing i notice seems to fill me up like a much-needed hot meal. it leaves no room for the distraction of self...all my silly little "needs" i've always been so preoccupied with. i never knew how MUCH there was around me. i love to watch people at a restaurant...dads making their kids laugh...couples unsure of themselves...girls laughing at inside jokes no one else would understand. how have i only seen the sad for so long? people hurt each other, yes. but people really know how to love each other, too. and the more i see it, it seems the bluer the sky gets and the sweeter the air tastes and the more i notice it. and how beautiful to come home at night. to sleep in a bed all my own. to simply be alone with no expectations...to let the thoughts that spin around slow down a bit and show themselves one at a time. to breathe deeply. to smile, not because there's anyone around to enjoy it, but because some of those thoughts land on people i love so deeply. and i'm reminded that i know and love some of the most amazing people on the planet. and i can think of them in detail because i know them so well. and i can enjoy their company even in the silence of my room because they are so deep in the core of me.

this is the abundant life. it's just plain old life, but more dimensional...or more colorful...or more vibrant. it's not situation. it's...i don't know...illumination. i think i get it now. thanks, God, for clearing that confusion up for me that i've had for so long.